Newsflash! Book #8: Harry Potter & The Lord of the Dorks
Just announced! The Harry Potter series will go for one additional book. The media, surprised as anyone, was flabbergasted when the title was leaked on tmz.com. Alas, "Harry Potter & The Lord of the Dorks" (or Harry Potter and The Lord of Dance - the UK title) will be released some time in Quarter 3, 2009.
The plot picks up between the ending of Book 7 and the epilogue. The book itself will be a whopping four pages and include a diagram of TPS reports and Pie Charts.
A spokesperson with Scholastic, the North American distributor of the popular series declined comment stating the company does not discuss forthcoming unreleased books.
J.K. Rowling was quoted in the London Daily News as stating "this is for the true Harry Fans. It will show a side of being a wizard that the likes have never seen... sleep deprived, unshaven and wearing the same clothes throughout the book."
It is unknown whether Daniel Radcliffe will reprise his role for the 8th installment as it is feared that his age will play a role.
Joanne Cushing, a spokesperson for Warner Brothers, the production company behind the Potter films declined direct comment, but released a statement indicating that Daniel would need to gain about 150lbs for the role, which might prove too challenging.
On popular movie search engine, imdb.com, Harry "could" be played by comedian Artie Lange. Lange, known for his tenure on Mad TV and most recently The Howard Stern Show, might indeed fit the part and require no additional physical conditioning (it should be noted that at last count, Mr. Lange weighed in at approximately 300lbs). All attempts to reach Mr. Lange's agent were unsuccessful.
Tuesday, July 24, 2007 .::. posted by Todd at
2:20:00 PM
